A Union of Cultures, A Celebration of Love Ray & Donna's Journey Between Sabah and Sarawak By Favstyle Magazine | Writer On-The-Go



In a world where love knows no boundaries, some unions become far more than a wedding celebration. They become a beautiful testament to heritage, family, tradition, and the enduring power of human connection.

For Ray Selutan and Donna Topodo Ireneus, their marriage is not merely the coming together of two individuals, but a graceful union between two of Borneo's rich cultural communities, bridging the traditions of the Lun Bawang people of Lawas, Sarawak, and the Kadazan community of Penampang, Sabah.

Their story unfolds like a timeless romance, woven through years of friendship, patience, understanding, and unwavering devotion.

From Friendship to Forever

Their journey began in 2014 during the National Service Training Programme (PLKN) in Kg Ovai, Papar. What started as a simple friendship gradually evolved into a deep and meaningful bond that would withstand distance, time, and life's many commitments.


Union of marriage between Ray & Donna



With Ray's family members from Lawas


While Donna pursued her dream of becoming an educator at Universiti Pendidikan Sultan Idris (UPSI) in Perak, Ray continued his technical studies at Institut Kemahiran Belia Negara (IKBN) in Miri. Their paths would eventually reconnect, and by 2021, friendship had blossomed into love.

Years later, beneath the warm embrace of Penampang's welcoming community, Ray proposed to Donna, marking the beginning of a new chapter that would unite not only their hearts but also two cherished cultural legacies.

A Wedding Rich in Heritage

Officially united under Native Customary Law on 8 June 2026, the couple's celebration is distinguished by the preservation of customs passed down through generations.

Their wedding journey beautifully embraces both cultural traditions. Among the highlights is the Lun Bawang Petated ceremony, a meaningful practice symbolising appreciation, generosity, and hospitality through the exchange of gifts between families and guests.


Cake cutting after their marriage at Native Court



Both families during the Mencalit Darah ritual held at Ireneus Simon's residence


Equally significant is the Kadazan ritual known as Mencalit Darah, a sacred symbolic ceremony conducted on the eve of their customary marriage. Deeply rooted in respect, reconciliation, and blessings, the ritual serves as a heartfelt expression of goodwill between families, reinforcing the importance of unity and harmony.

Together, these customs transform the occasion into something far greater than a wedding. They become a living celebration of identity, ancestry, and belonging.

Discovering Each Other's Worlds

One of the most remarkable aspects of Ray and Donna's relationship is their mutual desire to learn, appreciate, and preserve each other's traditions.

Donna has embraced the warmth and communal spirit of Lawas, where villagers continue to uphold the treasured practice of gotong-royong, gathering together to prepare feasts, celebrate milestones, and strengthen community bonds.

She has also developed an appreciation for Lun Bawang cuisine, particularly traditional dishes such as Luba Naya, while eagerly looking forward to discovering more culinary treasures from her husband's homeland.


Senior relative Mdm Clarice put on blood to both Ray & Donna


Couple Ray & Donna during the Mencalit Darah ritual


In return, Donna hopes to share the beauty of Kadazan culture through iconic traditions such as the graceful Sumazau dance and beloved heritage dishes including linopot, hinava, and tuhau.

Their marriage reflects a modern love story grounded firmly in cultural pride, proving that preserving heritage and embracing diversity can coexist beautifully.

A Vision of Elegance and Cultural Pride

As preparations continue for their church wedding and grand reception at KDCA Hall, the couple envisions a celebration filled with vibrant traditional attire representing both Sabah and Sarawak.

Imagine a hall illuminated not only by elegant décor but also by the stunning colours, intricate beadwork, and centuries-old craftsmanship of Borneo's indigenous communities. It is a vision that embodies cultural sophistication, pride, and timeless elegance.

For Donna, the refined beauty of the Kadazan Moludu attire remains especially close to her heart. Ray's heritage, meanwhile, introduces her to the captivating grandeur of Lun Bawang traditional costumes and the distinctive Pata', a headpiece that reflects the artistry of his community.


A meal shared by Donna's family during the visit


Building Bridges Through Love

Beyond the ceremonies, traditions, and celebrations lies a deeper message.

Today, Ray serves professionally in Brunei while Donna dedicates herself to educating young minds at SK Lok Yuk Sikuati in Kudat. Together, they represent a new generation of Borneans who honour their roots while embracing the future.

Their story serves as a powerful reminder that cultural differences are not barriers but opportunities to learn, grow, and unite.

In bringing together Sabah and Sarawak through marriage, Ray and Donna have created a living bridge between communities, demonstrating that love flourishes most beautifully when enriched by understanding, respect, and shared heritage.

As they begin this exciting new chapter together, their journey stands as an inspiring symbol of unity, reminding us that traditions become even more meaningful when they are shared.

A celebration of culture.

A celebration of family.

Above all, a celebration of love.

Congratulations to Ray Selutan and Donna Topodo Ireneus on their extraordinary journey and the beginning of a lifetime together.

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